Get Your Premium Membership


Floating, hovering like a dragonfly in search of a safe landing place. Roaming, travelling, never settling, in constant fear of desolation. No beginning, and no end in sight - - suspended animation - certain of my creation, but hanging like a mist or balanced like a spider on its gossamer web. Unconditional love did not exist for me: there was always a condition. Insecure security - no blood ties you see. No sense of belonging, so belonging nowhere. The illusion was there and I believed it for a while. My childhood innocence allowed me that, but now, in callous adulthood, I am spared no pain. In harsh reality, cold light of day, the truth is stark: I was abandoned, given birth to and relinquished for no reasons known to me. No explanation given. No excuses. An inebriated memory, or a raped repugnance. Yes, an unhappy, irritating accident probably. Born and gone - out of sight and out of mind. The effects of that inauguration are hardly ever seen - they're privately wept for; written about; drunkenly discussed at dinner, or in times of despondency, dwelt unhealthily upon, when their deep-seatedness shallows into consciousness and lurches from my dreams into reality - forcing face-to-face acknowledgement that I was not meant to be: that my existence was a nuisance, a niggling inconvenience to be discarded heartlessly.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2008

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

A comment has not been posted for this poem. Encourage a poet by being the first to comment.