Home » Poems » Eileen Manassian » Redemption Knight- For Medaeval Contest

Redemption Knight- For Medaeval Contest

He rode the wind on mighty steed He drove it fast to gain more speed To win maiden in noble deed As he galloped in the night… He found his damsel in distress With dragon claws clutching her dress Disheveled hair and heart astress As he galloped within sight… One swift leap and he came aground His rebel yell a mighty sound Courage to fight in her he found As he strode into her plight… She gazed at eyes of azure blue A depth of love she never knew For handsome knight so brave and true As she held on with her might… He sunk he sword in to the hilt Dragon heart blood to ground was spilt Caught the damsel about to wilt As his valor set things right… In his strong arms she found her place She gazed into his angel face Between their bodies not a space As the night was tinged with light… He bowed his head to plant a kiss A song of love, no dragon hiss Her world now filled with utter bliss As to heaven they took flight…. For Isaiah Zerbest Medaeval contest August 3, 2013

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 4/17/2019 10:06:00 AM

So enjoyable to read again. Hugs Rick.

John Posey

Date: 8/25/2013 2:31:00 PM

Well done, Ellen. Congratulations on a well deserved win.... Jake

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/25/2013 2:45:00 PM

Jake, thanks for the post. You haven't been around for a bit. Hope all is well.

Danesh Morgan

Date: 8/25/2013 3:04:00 AM

Congrats on yr win. Morgan

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/25/2013 2:45:00 PM

Morgan, thanks for taking the time to come back here and congratulate me. I appreciate it! :)

Skat A

Date: 8/24/2013 7:51:00 PM

Awesome winning poem....SKAT

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/25/2013 2:46:00 PM

Thanks, Skat. I appreciate the post!

Shadow Hamilton

Date: 8/23/2013 4:19:00 PM

Eileen I am enchanted by your tale congrats on win Shadow x smile

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/25/2013 2:46:00 PM

Enchanted...sweet! Thanks for that, Shadow.

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 8/22/2013 12:47:00 PM

Enjoyed reading again, congratulations, a well deserved win Eileen!

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/25/2013 2:47:00 PM

Thanks, Richard. Kind of you to come by and post this.

Carol Eastman

Date: 8/22/2013 10:57:00 AM

BRAVO! Each stanza was written sooo very well... and the story was marvelous..Your wording was exquisite... Congrats on such a great poem and win...

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/25/2013 2:48:00 PM

What a lovely, sweet, and lovely post, Carol! So glad that you enjoyed my poem and that you passed by! Hugs!

Carrie Richards

Date: 8/21/2013 6:48:00 PM

I am swooning with old maiden heart palpations after reading this one!! So fun to read.....and pleased to share placement with you !!! Congratulations!

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/25/2013 2:49:00 PM

An honor, indeed, to share the spot with you, Carrie. Thanks for the lovely visit. we all need a fairy tale now and again, don't we?

Isaiah Zerbst

Date: 8/21/2013 5:57:00 PM

Awesome rhymes! And so very ideal! I am struck by the attention to detail in this piece as well. The dragon claws, the grand emotions, the "utter bliss"!

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/25/2013 2:50:00 PM

Isaiah, I'm so grateful for the place you gave my poem in your contest. Thanks every so much for this kind post. I'm grateful!

Danesh Morgan

Date: 8/11/2013 7:42:00 PM

All the best sister, this has all the formula, for a winner! Need i say more. . . ?

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/25/2013 2:52:00 PM

Thank you for that, Danesh....Yes, more please!

Debbie Duncan

Date: 8/9/2013 9:46:00 AM

love it ,,,, good luck in contest ;}

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/25/2013 2:44:00 PM

Late with this, but thanks for the wishes.... They worked! :)

Karen Anglesey

Date: 8/6/2013 9:07:00 PM

You are an exceptional talent..your work is absolutely stunning...I love it...going in my faves:)

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/9/2013 3:36:00 AM

Stunning? Wow...What an invigorating adjective for me, Karen...i'm flying with your words of praise. Thank you!

Richard D Seal

Date: 8/5/2013 4:47:00 AM

Seems I've missed the debate over the last two stanzas so I can't comment on that. This though, tells the story well and flows freely. A good form for this tale. Good luck in the contest. Take care, Richard

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/5/2013 8:05:00 AM

You know what they say about the cat being away.... ;) I"m glad you like the flow of the poem, Mr Seal....I'm not even sure if this form has a name, so I just put it in the rhyme category. I need the luck...I need it...Keep rooting for me!

Harry Horsman

Date: 8/5/2013 12:17:00 AM

love the passion,, i would never change a poem as good as this,, just write another similar then we can have two beautiful poems to cast one's eye upon..this is lovely///

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/5/2013 3:49:00 AM

Harry!!!!! Thanks ever so much for the post. Always great to hear from you. :) I'm smiling in real life too! :)

Honestly J.T.

Date: 8/4/2013 10:51:00 AM

Hmm... edit the beginning part of line 17 and 18 then you decide on the last two stanzas.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/4/2013 11:10:00 PM

I had a look, PJ...I'm not sure how? Care to give me some suggestions? Thanks!

Poet Tacito

Date: 8/4/2013 7:51:00 AM

This was coated in more of Eileen's fiery & passionate pen. I have this strong urge now to see Robin Hood: Men in Tights, the only good Robin Hood movie that matters. =D A very endearing end in this piece.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/4/2013 11:11:00 PM

Oh Drake....I read the story of Robin Hood. No movie can do it justice, I'm sure...especially not Men in Tights! HA HA HA HA HA! Anyway...the part where he dies in Little John's arms after shooting the arrow had me sobbing for hours. My Mama thought I was losing it. Thank you for fiery and passionate...if I lose those qualities...I might as well stop writing. HUGS!

Mustapha Mohammed

Date: 8/4/2013 2:49:00 AM

Your rhyming schematics was beautifully put together Eileen.This was well done.I love it.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/4/2013 11:21:00 PM

WOW! Thank you so much for this endearing post, Mustapha. I'm so pleased! :)

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 8/3/2013 2:47:00 PM

When you write those stanzas seperatly they are quite beautiful, They feel like a poem that can stand on their own. Perhaps it is the change in rhyme that threw me off.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/4/2013 11:09:00 PM

Well, I certainly do NOT want to throw you off, Richard. You were right...This way I got two poems out of one! Good deal. Always be on hand to guide me! Hugs!

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 8/3/2013 1:46:00 PM

This is good, not exactly sure what changed but this feels better. Well done Eileen.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/3/2013 1:52:00 PM

He dressed her in virgin white To bedchamber did invite Candles set to glowing light For her passion to ignite As she gave in to her knight He took her to wondrous height The night shimmered with delight Heaven burst upon her sight I deleted these two stanzas in the end....

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/3/2013 1:48:00 PM

Oh Richard....I took out those last two stanzas...those that I had in mono rhyme.......

Nette Onclaud

Date: 8/3/2013 1:41:00 PM

great wordsmith you are, eileen... is there a sequeal to this one... romance and valor at theor best!..:) huggs

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/3/2013 1:42:00 PM

Hi Nette...I did have two more stanzas to it, but....I deleted them. Glad you liked this! Hugs!

Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 8/3/2013 12:31:00 PM

... as a romantic adventure story Eileen, I love it! - Wish you and your family a beautiful weekend.- Luck in contest !!!! - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/3/2013 1:43:00 PM

Anne Lise....thanks you so much for your visit and sweet words! Hugs!

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 8/3/2013 12:21:00 PM

A very romantic piece in the tradition of great fairy tales. I would rework the very last stanza, not sure why but it does not flow for me. I love the rest of the piece.

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/3/2013 12:24:00 PM

Richard....shall I just delete the last two stanzas? Do they detract???? I don't know how to fix the last stanza. I liked the play on Knight and night, but if it doesn't flow....it's got to go! ;) HUGS

Eileen Manassian

Date: 8/3/2013 11:03:00 AM

Opinions please: Do you think I should leave out the last two stanzas as I have changed the rhyme pattern to give it a more lyric type of quality at the end....Please...I'm open to suggestions. Do you think the last line should be...As to heaven they took flight?