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Random Thoughts 61 Mirrored Refrain

Mirrored Refrain xaBA,xbAB,xaBA,xbAB x represents the only lines that do not rhyme in this poem. A & B represent the refrain! Linda-Marie Angelic force, draping over me, her canopy. Unmasking the wonder of this youngster, her spirits alive within me You helped erect my "secret window" Ambitiously chasing what I hunger! Her spirits alive within me, unmasking the wonder of this youngster! Our poetry sessions, I sit and reminisce. Stress free, under this willow tree Unmasking the wonder of this youngster, her spirits alive within me! When depressed and blue you come through, relax me when feeling vulgar. Her spirits alive within me, unmasking the wonder of this youngster! Every verse meant to impress this poetess, an essence of the empress I aim to please! Unmasking the wonder of this youngster, her spirits alive within me! Harshest critic yet my biggest fan, imperfections cast asunder Her spirits alive within me, Unmasking the wonder of this youngster Death cannot take the gift I was given, Linda-Marie!! Unmasking the wonder of this youngster, her spirits alive within me. Jared Pickett 2/17/2014 Asavvy1

Copyright © | Year Posted 2014




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Date: 2/22/2014 12:30:00 PM
Great work honoring Linda-Marie..She will linger in your memory..Thanks for the visit to my page..Sara
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Date: 2/20/2014 11:01:00 PM
Jared,how can I forget how great you are with unusual forms. I remember how much i loved that first swap quatrain I saw of yours. But I have to tell you that I was thinking of doing a contest on that form since before Xmas. I should have told everyone doing my contest to put swap quatrain in the heading! I have been clicking on entries into my contest and I don't want to know who is writing them. I am weird that way in my contests!! But glad to know you have entered!! luv, Andrea LOVE this poem!
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Jared Pickett
Date: 2/21/2014 10:04:00 AM
I totally understand not wanting names! I apologize, I hope that I did not ruin my poem for you by posting it;-( !!!Asavvy1
Date: 2/18/2014 10:40:00 AM
Jared great lines, great theme, great dedication...David
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Jared Pickett
Date: 2/18/2014 10:44:00 AM
Thank you brother!! Appreciate you thoughts.. Asavvy1
That Archaic Poet Avatar
Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 2/18/2014 10:41:00 AM
Whoops! Sorry, David; I responded on the wrong line!
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 2/18/2014 10:40:00 AM
No problem :)
Date: 2/18/2014 10:12:00 AM
I think your rhyme scheme it tight and succinct and your feelings are well-stated. I did not like the repetition of "youngster". I'm not a big fan of repetitious lines in rhyme; I've always felt it was useful in free-verse, though. All in all, I enjoyed this poem. I see why you did the repetition, though. Just because I'm not a fan of it doesn't mean it's not well-written and expressed; just a personal aesthetic, I suppose. Kudos; hope this was the kind of review for which you are looking :)
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Just That Archaic Poet
Date: 2/18/2014 10:40:00 AM
No problem :)
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Jared Pickett
Date: 2/18/2014 10:28:00 AM
Absolutely, Thank you.
Date: 2/18/2014 10:06:00 AM
Random's my middle name :) Jared, this is a heart wrenching poem. Losing Linda, was a big deal in my family. She was the soul of many of us here. I still remember how she called me Little PD. She left a precious gift in our hearts. This is the first poem, I've read on LindaMarie. Besides old ones, My heart is broken for all who love and will forever miss her. I will cherish your poem, a beautiful reminder of how Linda stole our hearts. A fav, God Bless. Royal
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Jared Pickett
Date: 2/18/2014 10:29:00 AM
She did all that you have mentioned and more!! She will never die, in my heart she resides.. Thank you for stopping by dear friend!!Asavvy1

Book: Shattered Sighs