I Want To Run

I ran for a long time. And from alot of different things. And you can be running and not even know your running. My whole life was a sprint away from pain. My family called me so strong. They applauded my solidity. My stability. My reliability. She'll never let us down. It's a little awkward now. Because I did let them down. And I'm not strong. But I am fast. And I know how to run. And I know how to hide things away in a special folder. For later or never. But mostly never. I haven't faced the things I'm afraid of. Spent 22 years hiding. Never daring to open those folders because frankly my memory of them was gone. But now they're open. And I see myself again. And I've stopped running. And I felt my pain. And I will continue to feel it And it's gonna hurt. Deeply. Bring it on.