Harumph To Holiday Hoopla Phish Pshaw

Harumph To Holiday Hoopla – Phish Pshaw! Relieved of fatherhood Saint Nick schtick found me to relinquish ratty outfit, and stow away zee bras like padding and "FAKE flowing beard, ah...don't remind me, those well worn faux paws of each dear deer (hooping Rudolf would set precedent as every other reindeer hoof dost not get cleft out in the cold) withdraws not to budge like...a Mexican stonewall contractual obligations grudgingly negotiated, (especially citing animal abuse as insanity clause), while angrily clattering rooftop to rooftop, without pause, what, and me forcing those strenuous hee haws (hint to potential dada's, that ledger domain promising humongous gifts gets old fast, generating nuttin boot lockjaws (other Kris Kringles would agree), where haggard overworked (underpaid) frequently threatening unionized joining posse to become outlaws migrant elves lose stamina to applause, the jolly ho ho ho role of Santa Claus, and to a lesser extent return (like new - with store tag) Easter Bunny suit, defacto birthday party planner, et cetera, oh...almost forgot tooth fairy - ouch! that took a bloody bite out of finances, hence needed heavy duty gauze, yet now this papa merely draws lipservice joy to the world Bobe myseh, aye yie yie despite punishing, nee turning into filet mignon, those who poo poo those culturally grafted pagan grand Poobahs face lash, and quickly get smote with invisible taws particularly any antiestablishmentarianism leftist southpaws, no matter poetically wry ming spewed cents ability uttered from courtesy minority reporting maws, (case in point dexterously yours truly) laments glaring flaws, not only of those unaccountable booking costs driving Earthly unaffordable materialistic capitalistic jaws, no matter (albeit more quiet and somber), I breathe sigh of relief to escape naws zee hating crass mass foofaraws, and beat hasty retreat from pandemonium (part and UPS parcel) fueling manufacturing factories producing widgets, trinkets, gewgaws, et cetera subsequently giving employment (reed nepotism) opportunities to aunts, uncles in-laws of management (a perk found most objectionably with he who doth trumpet deed duck shins to needy) re: yule stated Taj Mahal family cause, but to enrich the coffers of salivating power hungry (jibber jabber) money grubbers brandishing chainsaws to cut down farmed Christmas trees, where dollar signs spin each eyeball rubbed raws, this minor manifesto concludes as welcome retreat, where stale Yuletide saws reverberate warbled carolers punctuating psalm songs with ews ah ahs!