Rhoda Tripp Poet Sonnet

From My Lips To Santa's Ears

Santa, I have an important request.
Please don't embarrass me with ho ho hos.
If you'd looked at my face you might have guessed.
I'm serious about fixing my nose.

I can sense you are stifling your laughter.
Your bowl full of jello, nicely restrained.
Proboscis happily ever after,
Would not appear that it's been candy caned.

Hire a team of rhinoplasty surgeons.
I create damaging winds with this thing.
Like the limb of an oak tree it burgeons.
Just yesterday a blue jay perched to sing.

Hurry, Dear Santa, its growth won't abate.
Go talk to Rudolph, as he can relate.

***********************************

There may be some problems I must address.
Lies emitted from hole under my snout.
Pains me Santa, I readily confess.
Please be patient as I utter these out.

I lied to Sonya about her red dress.
Made her butt dwarf a Volkswagen fender.
I lied to the postman, my home address.
Marked the water bill "Return To Sender".

I fibbed a little to co-worker, Sue.
Her peanut butter cookies smelled like feet.
But tell me, what the heck was I to do?
I wrapped and hid it in a slice of meat.

Santa, I am a serial liar.
Instead of my pants, set my nose on fire.

***********************************

I'll do better if button nose gifted.
I promise to be more a straight shooter.
A smaller nose, my spirits be lifted.
Seriously, would you want this hooter?

The fibs I told did no permanent harm,
But if you would like I can change all that.
Who "nose"?  I may lose my personal charm.
If I tell my friend Sonya she is fat.

If you leave money in an envelope,
I'll pay the water bill before it's due.
I can rub Sue's cookies with fragrant soap.
For a nose job, I will eat one or two.

Santa, I know you smell something is rot.
But I am here to assure you, it's snot.



Written 12/12/2017
"From My Lips to Santa's Ears"
Contest 
Hosted by Phillip Garcia

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Susan Gentry July 4, 2018 at 8:28 AM Omg!! This is hilarious! So good. Congratulations on your win. I have laughed so hard my side hurts. A fave. Had to read to hubby. We are always going on about his nosr lol. Rhoda Tripp July 13, 2018 at 10:59 PM Hahaha...Thank you Susan. I'm glad you liked it...I have to laugh or should I say snortle? (new word)

Line Gauthier July 3, 2018 at 7:16 AM Very cute and original, Rhoda. Or should we call you Pinocchio?! LOL Rhoda Tripp July 13, 2018 at 10:58 PM Call me anything, Line...just don't call me late for dinner. Lol. Go on FB and check out the nose! You'll see I'm serious.

Paul Callus January 23, 2018 at 9:40 AM Good thing I smelled out this very entertaining poem, Rhoda:):) Your humour knows no bounds! Still giggling silly, both at the poem/s and some of the comments below:) Regards // paul Rhoda Tripp January 24, 2018 at 4:33 AM Lol. Paul. Thank you for your kind comment. We do have some very unique and humorous poet friends here at the Soup. Have a great day, friend.

Edward Mccall December 21, 2017 at 3:09 PM LMAO!!! Rhoda this is just too funny. I kid you snot! Rhoda Tripp December 21, 2017 at 6:09 PM Lol. Thank you, Dear. It was a real booger to write!

Richard Lamoureux December 19, 2017 at 9:21 AM This is so funny! So well done. Rhoda Tripp December 19, 2017 at 12:23 PM Thank you kindly, Richard. Your laughter is my due reward.

Jan Allison December 13, 2017 at 1:28 AM Really made me giggle Rhonda good luck in the contest:-) hugs jan x Rhoda Tripp December 16, 2017 at 6:10 AM Glad you enjoyed it. The competition is stiff. Thank you for the well wishes.

CayCay Godwin December 13, 2017 at 12:15 AM Oh, my - what a riotous adventure of wit and humor I just jumped into! Clever. And clever will have to do because I wrote Santa similarly before, but it was boobs I asked for and he, apparently, thru my request on the floor. Seriously, just a great time with a nose theme that is the opposite of stink. Love it. CayCay Rhoda Tripp December 16, 2017 at 6:12 AM Lol. Glad you enjoyed it. My boobs are halfway to the floor already, so no harm there! Thank you for your hilarious comments. I always look forward to them.

Susan Ashley December 12, 2017 at 4:01 PM Hilarious Rhonda. A very witty write that I enjoyed very much! Well done.. good luck in the contest - it should do well :) Rhoda Tripp December 16, 2017 at 6:14 AM Thank you, Susan. Glad you enjoyed it. I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.

Kim Rodrigues December 12, 2017 at 1:41 PM Very humorous! Humongous in fact ;) Enjoyed the read! Now take those cookies out of your shoe.. and gesundeit...well I though I heard you sneeze — witch..chooo. Rhoda Tripp December 12, 2017 at 1:49 PM Oh, Kim...Lol Your comment is fantastic! I had to chuckle. Thank you for reading. Wish me luck. The competition rocks!

John Gondolf December 12, 2017 at 11:33 AM Rhoda, not only did you do the sonnets well but your story was hilarious, I about fell out of my chair laughing. I love your sense of humor! Good luck in the contest; it's a winner in my book. John Rhoda Tripp December 12, 2017 at 11:44 AM Awwww. Thank you, John, so much. I didn't know where this was heading when I started, but I just kind of threw in some truths and fantasies tinged with a bit of humor. I'm so glad you enjoyed it. Thank you for your kindness.

Vijay Pandit December 12, 2017 at 10:56 AM WOW! This is a tremendous undertaking and you did it so well, Rhoda--I enjoyed reading this poem..you chose a unique theme and executed it well..a winning poem for sure! Rhoda Tripp December 12, 2017 at 10:59 AM Thank you so much. Sonnets are difficult for me, so I hope I did okay. I appreciate your words of encouragement. You are a Dear.