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Enter Poem or Quote (Required)Required Grrrr WOMEN they drive me mad! We were due to go on holiday My wife said she was on her way I’d got the car engine running I waited and waited and waited But my wife Marcie was on the phone to her mom Marcie had INSISTED her mother lived in our granny flat Why couldn’t she pop next door to say goodbye… Going on holiday is the only way I can escape from the old bag Still at least she’s looking after Mitzi our Chihuahua We arrive at the airport just in time …. Marcie walks ahead in a cloud of Chanel No 5 perfume To me it smells like cat’s pee but if it was good enough for Marilyn Monroe she HAS to wear it Unfortunately I had chosen the only trolley with the wonky wheel That darn trolley has a mind of it’s own … it must be a female! The electric doors open and close like see through curtains I struggle with a mountain of three suitcases, but only one is mine And half of MY case is taken up with five pairs of Marcie’s shoes Tell me guys Why does a woman have to pack the kitchen sink ‘just in case’ One small suitcase is FULL of her make up Gee I hope she remembered to pack the trowel with which to apply it! At the check in desk we discover one of the cases is overweight Yes … you guessed it – its mine with all her bloody shoes in it I have to stump up thirty-five dollars in excess baggage fees! What a great way to start a relaxing break... When we board the plane things are no better Marcie moans about the cramped seats She has to ask for a seat-belt extension telling the stewardess the seats are smaller than those the last time we flew Maybe if she lost a few pounds that would make a difference … But of course I hold my tongue Marcie moans about the noise as we take off She moans about the aircraft food but still eats every mouthful She complains how tiny the toilet stalls are her huge butt doesn’t help but I hold my tongue As we are landing she says how much she misses her mom and the dog THAT WAS THE FINAL STRAW Next year Marcie and her mum can go away I’m staying at home with the dog! 06-12-17 FORESKINFEDORA FOR POETS WHO IDENTIFY AS MEN Sponsored By John Lawless
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