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Like Wingless Birds
I can tell you about the elongated nights. The pain and agony endured to the soul. The hammer of reality that aims to chisel at my pride until it resembles a statue of anguish and defeat. The way time and precious seconds taunt you when you have hopes of moving forward with life. Its inconsiderable essence. The way moments vanish like atheistic faith. During times of distinct disparity its motion reflects that of a shelled gastropod, and in the midst of joyous occasion, time flows like raging waters. Waving those moments into occipital entrapment. I can tell you the feeling of watching all the things you love in life pass by like highway signs. Life drawing me in to intersections while I'm chasing hope like a runaway freight train. Stopping me at red lights while opportunity makes every green light with time to spare. The feeling of being a puppet at every whim of a deviant puppeteer. And every day and night is show time. I can tell you about the tears I never shed as they flood my mind with thoughts of guilt and overwhelming sorrow. The moments I lacked sympathy and empathy at moments when short phrases and warm gestures needed implementation. Neglected communications as if I were aphasic. A shy man of few words cursed with a heart that speaks volumes. Sadly guilty of making bad decisions and acting maliciously when all I had were good intentions. I can tell you about the memories that haunt my mind like vivid pictures on a slide show on repeat. The unified heartbeat that once fluttered like angel wings have ceased. And have been buried beneath the soil where our love first began to grow. But the constant battles in this war of love between us has degraded the soil, inhibiting the possibility of our lost love from sprouting from the roots ever again. I can tell you about the essence of moonless nights and starless skies. The sensation of being engulfed in a tunnel of darkness and the only light source stems from an exit miles away. The despair sometimes feels like I'm gasping for air while submerged in the heart of the Artic. Or thirsting for freedom while journeying through the Amazon. The sure tangibility of dreams like a mirage. No boundless heights to strive for at the core of my eclipsed surroundings. The epitome of the world seen through the eyes of a wingless bird. Trying to emulate the gracious flight of Heaven's angels, but sometimes the world can be cruel.
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