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Sir Harold, Knight, the valiant swain
Did call his Lady Nell.
He held her close and kissed her hand
And bade her sweet farewell.
"Forth from here I needs must go
My swainly Lady Nell.
I shall return, my bonny lass
To hear our wedding bell."
"Ignoble lord, I'll wait for you,"
The lady she did say.
"Don't forget my diamond ring;
The wedding's set for May.
"I'd like three chests of herbs and spice
And a blooded horse to ride.
If these you manage Harold, dear,
I'll be a happy bride."
Sir Harold, Knight, the henpecked swain
Did ride upon the wind
That he might fight and battle see
In armor made of tin.
"For Lady Nell," he cried in war,
"For her the fight be won!"
He smote his foe with courage great;
The battle soon was done.
Sir Harold, Knight, the honored swain
Returnéd home to Nell.
He greeted her and she did say,
"Harry, you were swell!"
But Harold, Knight, was two months late,
And Lady Nell had news:
"I waited long as I could wait;
Just call me Lady Hughes."
Sir Harold, Knight, the spurnéd swain,
Did bludgeon Lady Nell.
"I forgot the damnéd diamond ring,
And since she's dead, it's just as well."
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