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Confessions of a Time Traveler
I created a time machine Because I have a sacred vision To abort Augustus Caesar Is my life's holy mission His dogmas concerning marriage And procreation for the state Precursor to that religion of empire I will personally eliminate Back to forty four BC With my trusty sniper rifle Crosshairs on Julius Caesar Then behind him just a trifle A young blond-haired lad His face as familiar as statue I pull the trigger with purpose Time takes a new avenue This founder of Western Civilization Lies dying on this date Julius Caesar now holds the boy I also know his coming fate Feeling justified in my actions I prepare for my return Laughing, don't worry about Brutus And from this century I adjourn Back to the future Feeling overwhelmingly inspired I can't wait to see a timeline That had no Roman Empire I begin looking around Everything looks about the same Except now I think in German And women are wearing war paint Then it hits me like a ton No historic suppression of women Not only are they smarter They're also the dominant specimens Some approach me with interest Looking at me rather coy Then they rip off all my clothes And use me like a sex toy That time machine is paying off I think I like this world Then I notice to my amazement It's being videoed by one girl Straight to the internet The exploitation of men Attention girls gone wild, I chuckle You ever heard of sin?
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