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Always Part of Me
When I was a very young girl a tragedy filled my world I watched my sister's blood soak the snow on the street she died while I stood with mom ... I still hear mom screaming and I went into a silent world and though I heard- I refused to speak I was in a dark and lonely place, so alone, so lost, so afraid, and sad Then, grandma reached into my dark world with her kind voice she would sit me on her knee and tell me her made up stories you see, grandma was the family storyteller and I loved her so much she will always and forever be my part of my heart and soul I listened to so many of her stories and I became a storyteller too I can recall watching her face while she spoke a story to the family and I was fascinated with her facial expressions and tone of voice though, I had heard her stories hundreds of times I would still listen she encouraged me to write- giving me a journal and special pen grandma told me to write my sadness and I did and I still do We would read what I had written over "a nice cup of tea" and we would hug and let our tears fall- she encouraged me to write "write it, write it for the world to read' - (I do grandma, I do !) grandma is a reflection of who I am today as a writer, I honor her and all my hurts I write ... though sad they are beautiful, so beautiful When grandma died at ninety-four she could not speak anymore her voice had been silenced by old age and she died quietly in her sleep I was shattered yet insisted on speaking at her catholic funeral writing seven pages about my grandma and what she meant to me I stood at the front of the church trembling- her casket a distraction But, when I went to speak a great wind took my papers away they floated around the church like they had wings and I was unsure but I heard a voice ("you don't need them") and I started talking I talked and talked about my grandma, me, and her stories when I finished, there was silence- except for the sound of weeping In that moment ... I knew the power of words and of storytelling grandma blessed me with her gift- the Lord blessed me with writing when I think of gran's face it is with so much love, her smile beautiful I will see my grandma Helena again ... she is waiting for me in Heaven and when we meet- she will say, "lets have a nice cup of tea"
Copyright © 2024 Constance La France. All Rights Reserved

Book: Reflection on the Important Things