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Enter Poem or Quote (Required)Required IF EVER I HAD A COUNTRY: LXXXIII IF ever I had a country, a country where I were, by virtue of the highly meritorious and exceptional services rendered to the State in conning and duping the People, persuaded to assume the role of Ministre d’Etat without Portfolio or duty I would – I solemnly assure you, the Common Folk –first and foremost focus my very close attention on the questions of feminist practices discriminatory And having noticed aghast with utter shame, disgust and fury that in some countries women (sadly excluding trans-gender athletes) are treated with utmost disregard, enmity and indignity As for example, they being downgraded to the abysmal level of having to play Soft-Ball (what’s that? “Round-us”?) while men knock-about with hard base-minded balls of virility I’ll invite the Minister of Sports to my official well-leathered and cushy chambers to see how I esteem my Personal Secretary by letting her turn up for work in her swim-suit with her pet monkey on her knee And I’ll warn him, nay, threaten him with my wagging fore-finger, on how I’ll under-cut his Olympic Budget in half if he didn’t thenceforth authorize soft-ball gals to cavort on the pitch with just the women’s Beach Volley Ball suit – with no “strings” attached – for all, including frustrated cameramen looking vainly for the “opening” shot…. for all to see And this, even if I were doomed to be strung up on the White House Christmas Tree So be it, even if I never ever had no country nor squash racquet to bash balls soft or hard care-free (c) T. Wignesan, Paris, August 12, 2021
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