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I got myself into quite a pickle
when sitting my driving test,
My nerves were making me jumpy
but my instructor said just try your best
The examiner looked like Godzilla -
he didn’t try to put me at ease,
My mouth was as dry as the desert
and you could hear the knock of my knees
I proceed to perform some manoeuvres
my three point turn’s timed to perfection,
The examiner tells me to take the next left
I turn right - I’ve got no sense of direction!
He thuds his hand on the dashboard,
says I must execute an emergency stop,
So I hit the brakes when he tells me
and I just avoid hitting a cop!
I begin to drive along the highway
when a cyclist weaves and cuts me up,
I step on the gas and fly past him
quite determined to pass the young pup!
The examiner yells at me to slow down ...
I quickly sense that something’s not right,
There’s a stench drifting up from his trousers
perhaps he had a duff curry last night!
He says he passes wind when he’s stressed out
I open the windows before we get gassed,
He abandons me at the test centre -
for many reasons I don’t think I’ve passed!
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