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The electrician on the Starship
The Electrician...... on the starship Enterprise the lights have gone all dim captain Kirk decided to get an electrician in the electrician's name was Bodger he was fully qualified what Captain Kirk didn't know was that he was completely colour blind one to beam up said the Captain Scotty was surprised when he noticed that Billy Bodger did not energise Scotty flicked some knobs and booted the machine the coordinates were out of phase and was nowhere to be seen “I dinny know what happened” the Scotsman shouted out It turned out that Billy Bodger had completely shorted out finally, he energised he was smoldering red hot his trousers were on fire and he was moaning quite a lot Spock grabbed the extinguisher and promptly set it to stun and covered Billy Bodger in a sticky gungee gum he opened up the fuse box It was full of coloured wires the insulation had melted and the box had caught on fire then suddenly there was this popping sound and a smell of burning wire then realised that the fuse box would need a complete rewire he followed all the wires along the starboard side he couldn't find the problem he was totally mystified the wires went along the wall then underneath the floor and followed all the wires to Lieutenant Uhura 's door he rang the doorbell softly the lieutenant pushed the door ajar she asked him “what's a matter” as he crawled along the floor the wires all came to a stop and there he saw the problem there was a three pin UK plug with a 15 way extension Connected to the wires there were lots of stuff plugged in i pad, sewing machine and an espresso coffee maker an electric hairbrush, curling tongs and a personal computer electric whisker, electric kettle and an ice cream maker there was a skybox, a Huawei 20 pro and a little blue tooth speaker a bedside light, a dimmer switch and a little yogurt maker a rechargeable chain-saw and a walking exerciser “What's a girl to do? “she said “I am a famous actress” “When I work on the starship “I've got to look completely ageless” now Bodger's job was over he was finally beamed back down he landed in the river Dronne where he nearly drowned Taking liberties with Grimmer, Spilling and Pants uation "All characters and events in this poem– even those based on real people – are entirely fictional and made up! Honest
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