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Greengay Advocate
When I was about twelve I began to see my future as a ruthlessly effective overpoweringly sublime advocate for justice as global peace outcomed and measured, As a courtroom drama officer of the U.S. multicultural Court EcoSystem, A flaring hot attorney of the U.S. and global green legal testosterone-preferred system. When I was about sixteen, I began to question the resilience of Win/Lose ecological and theological partial-rapture Dreams. I wanted to belong in a more resilient WinWin restoration of local through global peace through ecojustice and how could I do that in a Win/Lose punishment egosystem designed to avoid or at least ignore Loser predator and Loser prey's ultimate EarthTribe outcomes, pathological death and dying degeneration? When I was about twenty I began to see myself as a great preacher and teacher of WinWin co-redemptive multicultural and permaculturally perennial religion evolving straight through reincarnate cultures ourselves. But, how could I become that sainted preacher of rainbow natural and spiritually timeless integrity as an uncommitted agnostic, a mere investigative journalist rather than an active subject of history's grand full-voiced stage, or passive object of Win/Lose greed and lusting culture? I lack sufficient articulation within any one integrity path, one Paradise garden polypathic, one walk within God's harmonic matriarchal newborn voices, speaking creation through naturally diversifying generations, Advocating spiritual renewal restoring WinWin revolutions across every overt and pervert and divert system in every sacred land. When I was about twenty-four I felt sufficiently redeemed as a green gay prophet of sensory revolutionary WinWin experience, with some Win/Lose rapacious and tragic defeating compromises with Truth assiduously associated WinWin kinships with Earth's diversely sheltering lights and rhythmic patterns of 4Dimensioned dynamic habitats developed through cooperatively systemic relationships. I lacked sufficient WinWin theory to prophetically explain how to cooperatively recapture such profoundly prescient passion without psychotripic supports, not physically sustainable-- yet another Win/Lose compromised dead-end. Then there was my forty years of vocational wilderness wandering dark night of inside winter outside desert walking inside confusion, outside compliant inside dissonance to tolerate Win/Lose partially recycled monoculturing compromises inhabiting LeftBrain deductively monotheistic Either good Or bad dominating dualist dueling AnthroTribe, Not worshiping or even listening to natural/spiritual hybrids, like lovely lilies in green gay meadow memories, indigenous DNA enraptured Right/LeftBrain Win/Win outside/inside experience of polypathic rapture, sacred enchantments. When I was about 64 I began to understand how miserable I would have been as a Win/Lose advocate of U.S. violently punishing elite entitlements for an anthrocentric legal system with no orthodox health v pathology insight, little cooperative ecological hope, bad mono-elitist inaccessible entitlement toward MisTrust that once we enter God's Great Patriarchal CourtRoom anyone could possibly become integrally healed for and by and of and with profoundly accessible Win/Win experiential love for Ego co-arising therapeutic Eco-justice inside as outside habitat of sainted green advocates. Now I continue as yet another Win/Win health non-officer of Earth's non-patriarchal CourtSystem, A green gay outdoor student increasingly without indoor Win/Lose over-invested portfolio. This green gay preacher is happy to Green Proclaim It does not matter, the Source of current climate pathology, health-trend portfolios, robust v mistrusted health paradigms Whether act of Western and LeftBrain dominant over-extraction EitherUsNow-OrThemLater culture, or religion of overt ego-distraction, baptism into idolatrous conspiracy theories, whether illegal Act of God v. Future Resilient Healthy Creation This climate pathology cries through Win/Win ecosystemic hearts of patriarchs and matriarchs alike, and all creatures in-between dipolar tipping points of industriously competing history To remember To restore, inside and out, Our sacred RedSky warnings and defenses and secular open GreenSeas timeless landed vocational ground soil soul to resonate Paradise green ecojustice, cooperatively owned and DNA healthy polypathic wilderness peace within without Time our regenerately reverberating GreenSoul advocating Selves.
Copyright © 2024 Gerald Dillenbeck. All Rights Reserved

Book: Shattered Sighs