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Existential Chill

Expired eggs in my fridge give you hints of my disease
I'm so scattered 
And unfocused
And I'm hidden let me be
But when I see the pictures 
Of people happy on the lakes
I get this existential chill
That my life was a mistake
I'm not the talk of any town
I'm only here
Because I'm here
If you believe me you'd be proud
To watch me gladly dissapear
But in the event 
That I must wander
Let me find what I can find
An empty grave for the worries
I would gladly leave behind
But I hang on to all of the worries
Call me hoarder of the mind
One day I'll be too full
Ironic hater of design
God loves all his creatures
Rabbits frogs and maybe me
But last night I had a dream
That aired from 2 to 3
And In that dream a bunch of nonsense
Like dreams can always be
I saw an empty floating conscience
And inside, I saw me
I dont need a reason
But people need these reasons
Scattered colored specks of dust
Bring more movement to the seasons
And if I leave a scene for a reader
Who can read
I will always be unseen
Let me be
Let me be

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