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These clouds, surrounding my space

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Below is the poem entitled These clouds, surrounding my space which was written by poet Delilah Ventura. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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These clouds, surrounding my space

As these clouds keep surrounding, my space
I keep walking
Until, I've fallen to deep
Hoping and praying
I have a reachable hand
A ladder, some way up

I wish drum-fires, thunder-cracks and twisters
Would leave me alone
I wish my roses
Had no thorns, as they leave me bleeding
In so many places

I try to rinse off
Deep, deep in the ocean
Rinsing all these scars
I keep collecting, day by day

As, I lift up a voice and caterwaul
Take away my fever
Stop letting me, tumble
Stop receiving my blood
Each and every way I fight
Causing me to lose, my field of vision

Deep in these clouds
These clouds, surrounding my space
My only space

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  1. Date: 6/16/2012 9:08:00 AM
    nice write