When we stand before the Pearly Gates
St. Peter with his golden keys awaits
as the Book of Our Life is opened to the dates
to see if good deeds were done to our mates.
It lasts only a second but we think its late
As he scans the words next to the dates
and curious beads of sweat arise on our pates
for the Book contains the answer to our fates.
We begin to shift from leg to leg after a little while
thinking of all the things we did that were petty and vile.
More upon more of those thoughts we pile
until we can no longer stand the trial.
Then, St. Peter grabs his phone and slowly begins to dial
"He's here now, Lord" is overheard..."he's been in Purgatory for a while".
Then he hangs up the phone, and gives us a curious smile
"The Boss said He paid your fare...so into Heaven you can file"!