Deirdre Omaidin | + Follow Poet |
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Fatal Valentine

He rose
She watched
He paused
She gazed
He twitched
She sighed
He packed
She froze
He waited
She turned
He glanced
She shivered
He moved
She whispered
He paced
She sobbed
He freaked
She called
He frowned
She pleaded
He kissed
She wept
He turned
She knew
He left

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Wilma Neels Date: 1/21/2011 4:29:00 AM This is quite a riveting and sad write Deidre ;) Wilma Login to Reply

Richard Pickett Date: 12/31/2009 11:36:00 AM Very nice Deirdre, Lovely indeed. Go into your personal info click the box I want to receive Soup mail...and you should be able to receive....Great write....Taz Login to Reply

Ashlee Tilford Date: 10/2/2009 9:22:00 AM Great piece. Written with such passion. Love it. Login to Reply

Not Anymore Date: 3/10/2009 11:16:00 AM You wrote I read You waited I smiled You read I wrote: That was awesome Login to Reply

Carolyn Devonshire Date: 2/14/2009 8:50:00 AM Dear Dierdre, this poem beautifully tells such a sad story. I hope "he" has been replaced by someone more worthy of such a talented, sensitive woman. Login to Reply

Monique Davis Date: 2/8/2009 2:12:00 PM That was artistically written and captured my attention every step of the way. I felt like I was watching this couple change their life play by play. Beautiful- Monique Login to Reply

Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/8/2009 12:11:00 PM wowser!!!!! I thought one of them was going to shoot the other oneLOL good write. Light & LOve Debbie Login to Reply

Sandy Schermerhorn Date: 2/7/2009 10:41:00 AM rivioting piece of poetry here with this great write so sad but excellectly written Login to Reply

Brian Strand Date: 2/7/2009 7:27:00 AM well writtrn vignette Deirdre.Style suits the pace very well.rgds Brian & thanks for your welcom comments Login to Reply

Kristin Baker Date: 2/6/2009 6:25:00 PM Great poem...sad but so true for some unfortunately. Hope your valentine's day is better then this! Kristin Login to Reply

Maryam Jameela Haniff Date: 2/6/2009 1:44:00 PM oooh my! not a happy valentine, so sry for them...if they r real...sweet write!...*/*Maryam Login to Reply

Sean Kelly Date: 2/6/2009 12:33:00 PM So , that bear hug , did'nt work !! .. Deirdre this is a superb piece of story telling , in a most unique way ... Excellent !!! .. Login to Reply

Michael Degenhardt Date: 2/6/2009 11:52:00 AM Oh my, that's horrible! Not the poem, style or writing mind you, but the happening, what occured for the two of them. That's not a way to spend a Valentine. Michael Login to Reply