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Emergency Rooms Just Kill Me -

Tim Ryerson Avatar Tim Ryerson - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Emergency Rooms Just Kill Me - which was written by poet Tim Ryerson. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Emergency Rooms Just Kill Me -

Nurse: Briefly describe your pain
Me: Ouch
Nurse: On a scale from 1 to 10, how would you rate your pain?
Me: I dunno...where's your scale?
Nurse: No, no sir, on a scale...
Me: Okay!...180 butt-naked
Nurse: When was the last time you had a physical exam?
Me: Well, me and this lady went out the other night...
Nurse: We'll need a stool sample
Me: YOUR stool or my stool? I'll need a saw...
Nurse: We'll need to do some lab work
Me: I understand, it's hard to keep good help isn't it?
Nurse: Do you have a history of suicide?
Me: Umm...
Nurse: Are you having trouble urinating?
Me: Just a sec...nope, no problem here
Nurse: Sh-t!
Me: Just a sec...nope, no problem here
Nurse: Son of a...How many fingers am I holding up??
Me: Aha!...One in the middle and four bent ones, right?
Nurse: I swear to G... Sign this freekin' admittance form!
Me: Uh uh!...I deny the whole thing...
Nurse: (Sigh) Are you allergic to anything?
Me: Hospitals...

Copyright © Tim Ryerson

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  1. Date: 1/7/2013 8:16:00 AM
    Tim - Now this is poetry in scrubs. love, Kathy

  1. Date: 1/5/2013 1:18:00 PM
    So Tim if you have a stand-up night, many a poet would enjoy it, myself included! Love your humor! Hugs

  1. Date: 1/1/2013 11:46:00 AM
    L.O.V.E.D... it! My son is studying to be a nurse... Can't wait to show it to him... It'll be on my fav. list! Happy New Year...

  1. Date: 12/31/2012 3:52:00 PM
    Absolutely that's a good one for your write a sequel with Tim ROLLICKING! ;) Happy New Year! Light & Love Cher

  1. Date: 12/31/2012 9:08:00 AM
    Smilin' Tim! Thanks for stoppin' by...jimbo

  1. Date: 12/31/2012 8:00:00 AM
    Tim, Tim, Tim,...which hospital was this??? hahah....Yeah, I'm with Andrea, some stand up comedy!! Hope you'll have a big audience tonite!! Happy New Yrs to u! 2014 could be a BIG YR!!! :) gwendolen

  1. Date: 12/31/2012 6:19:00 AM
    Tim, ha ha ha ha, I love this, have a happy and peaceful New Year...David

  1. Date: 12/31/2012 4:21:00 AM
    Last day of 2012, I welcome you to a new year 2013. - - Looking forward to reading your poems in 2013. - - HAPPY NEW YEAR! - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)

  1. Date: 12/30/2012 10:14:00 PM
    this is really funny, you should do standup, my friend.

  1. Date: 12/30/2012 7:05:00 PM
    This is funny, especially when you describe the things that they always say and ask you.