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Deep in the dark depths of disaster, disassociated disaster distracting distraction distracted Bleh, bahumbug! Why should I care how I start this this will just be tossed to the wayside all over again Forgive me, my swift carelessness of attacking my audience but an audience is what I lack an audience I can't seem to attract with all my charm and allurances, I attract not a soul so I wear this makeshift bowl upon my head, a helmet as I prepare for the crash that will come from my left side to do nothing more than paralyze me so I can stand no more and shout not a word of my frustrations Satisfy me, please hear me utter just one sentence so I know someone's listening I have a voice too, you know I have a voice too But I know you have the choice to ignore it So why in the 21 years of life has my tongue not been stolen, silenced on repeat over and over again For opinions unheard of, opinions not gained, opinions apparently undeserved Despite my stature, despite my interests, despite my tendencies I am an adult tell that to my father, I'd tell him myself but he shares my mother's ears every word I muster in protest, in a stand alone complex everything I build myself upon capsize cape side like a sinking rowboat unable to kick, scream, punch my way out of this dilemma I can only sit and dream of ways to reach far beyond the borders of the walls I once thought were home though all my ways are longshots built for hotshots or people with pure luck and I'm neither, arise the nickname longshot kid I dream big but the world has no use for my big city dreams when there's no real chance I'll ever even get out of this dead end town I'd likely drown in the river of broken dreams feasting upon me for I fed the river a dead dream again last night now faded hello daylight, just stay away from my feet before I stomp you out, I hate you *sigh* Forgive me, I'm just not fond of staying mute What would you have me do and now I'm stuck, holding a comma in the air like a sickle as I try to scale this mountain unprepared I'm always prepared but all the utilities I brought with me to succeed somehow found a way out of my grasp and into a deep chasm I'm too afraid with frailty to jump in headfirst knowing I'd break my body in half at first impact my soul already feels like it's halfway out the door at least it left the light on to know it'll return but will I return to the world of entertainment, the world of pleasing ears and eyes with reviews and blogs You're all probably laughing at me, doubled over laughing at my grief for you've found the source of my dismay shouting at me beyond the screen to show some backbone, grow a spine, to stop complaining and do something real grab something real, tangible, constructive and never let it go it'll last longer than public opinion Well my opinion of your carefully thought out generic answer is a middle finger in your direction my foot in your rear end my fist in between your eyes, all I see is red Well I would if all I see right now wasn't so blue I ordered an audience, asked for an audience, pleaded for audience but as long as I stay faceless, nameless wish granted What good is anonymously receiving credit for your own words, your own work if you can't claim it This is running away from me a waterfall of emotion mixed with an avalanche of words creates a disaster distracting distraction distracted I ended this how i started so apparently i can go out how i began like a word i just said never even mattered I've only said enough to get the point across apparently never enough to get an entire crowd to stand in silence to listen

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