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Three Wives

 Said Jones: "I'm glad my wife's not clever;
Her intellect is second-rate.
If she was witty she would never Give me a chance to scintillate; But cap my humorous endeavour And make me seem as addle-pate.
" Said Smith: "I'm glad my wife's no beauty, For if a siren's charm she had, And stinted her domestic duty, I fear that she would drive me mad: For I am one of those sad fellows Who are unreasonably jealous.
" Said Brown: ""I know my wife's not witty, Nor is she very long on looks; She's neither humorous nor pretty, But oh how she divinely cooks! You guys must come some night to dinner - You'll see my little girl's a winner.
" So it's important in our lives, (Exaggerating more or less), To be content with our wives, And prize the virtues they possess; And with dispraise to turn one's back On all the qualities they lack.

by Robert William Service
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