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Post-Sl-t Clarity
My loneliness holds me by a chokehold
reality's a struggle to swallow
rough sex, a remedy
to off problems until tomorrow
Spent the day sulking in post-**** clarity
devouring hunger for breakfast
this evening I'll be grieving the ghosts
in my sex pest infested direct messages
rebound boys
wreak havoc on my regrets list.
Pretending I’m not constantly haunted by absences
ramping up nonrhetorical questions
if I’m matter enough
to take space in anyone’s heart
if anyone’s touch
is enough to imprint my skin
because the rush of lust is short-lived
until succumbing to nothingness
in the destruction of love-bombing
setting ablaze unmatchable passion
anxious-avoidant attachments again
destroying the foundations
of the hierarchy
for my heart’s capacity for men who love like empty voids
emotionless
armed
locked and loaded
anticipating explosions
Is this all I am to you?
If I unveiled my vulnerabilities
would you view me as unlovable?
insufferable?
like I’m >smothering< you?
When you become my drug
and I can never get enough of you,
would you still want me?
or just my body?
to get off? just get off me
or drop
to your knees
and
beg.
Copyright ©
Talon Drake
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