Wheres My Keys
Where's my keys, I'm late for work
They should be on that shelf
If you've moved them you're a jerk
I'll look for them myself
So...
I've turned the whole house upside down
And looked in Benji's bed
The pockets in my dressing gown
And under uncle Ted
Of course I've looked beside the phone
And what is that you ask
I don't appreciate your tone
They're not stuck up my... bum
I've moved the fridge and microwave
And lifted up the mat
I looked inside the oven too
I even shook the cat
I grabbed the dog and held him down
And gazed into his jaws
I even searched my underwear
And rummaged round in yours
Every time I make a plan
Something always wrecks it
It's like my keys have gone on strike
It must be down to brexit
So, fess up moron, where's my keys
It's gone beyond a joke
Was it just a drunken prank
Or were you high on coke
You must think I'm quite stupid
But you're the silly cow
I know you must have moved my keys
So give them back right now
So now we get the waterworks
Boo Hoo, I made you cry
Oh heck, I fear it might be time
To eat some humble pie
Haven't felt like such a burk
Since I was in my teens
I found out where my keys did lurk
They're right here in my jeans
Copyright © Terry Flood | Year Posted 2018
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