The Scottis Generale
The Scottis Generale,
Nicholas McJockstrap
Waes undefaited fu a decaid
Due to the nikkirless trap
But on thys partikul day…
Thei stud on the highelands
Withe thir kyltes flyring highe
Ase thir baggpypis pleyed
“Thes wyll gyve yu a stye in yur ey”
Thir ennemy, takin abak
By the sicht thei sawe
Thene advaunced wyth a skreyme
Saing “shou eus soum moary”
The Scottis secreet weapun
Ded nott wark
It juist creatted a frynze
Drave the ennemy berrserk
The ennemy, sailors
Adaptared thei sexeul palatiat
As thei strypped ofe thei cloath
Ty revele frokes fram a swanne laik ballatt
Thei foloued thei Captain
Byg Baud Benn
Skreyming “Kille ale the women”
“Ande raap ale the meyn”
***************************
Translation
The Scottish General
Nicholas McJockstrap
Was undefeated for a decade
Due to his nickerless trap
But on this particular day…
They stood on the highlands
With their kilts flying high
As their bagpipes played
“This will give you a sty in your eye”
Their enemy, taken aback
By the sight they saw
Then advanced with a scream
Saying “Show us some more”
The Scottish secret weapon
Did not work
It just created a frenzy
Drove the enemy berserk
The enemy sailors
Learned to adapt their sexual palates
As they stripped off their clothes
To reveal frocks from a swan lake ballet
They followed their Captain
Big Bad Ben
Screaming “Kill all the women”
“And rape all the men.”
Copyright © Sidney Hall Mad Poet | Year Posted 2011
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