Shana Aubrey Harris - Part One

born two days after ole Punxsutawney i.e. the Doctor Phil - of woodchucks Latin Name = Marmota Monax nest resembled Rastafarian hair weave, which creature rattled with ire and peeveishness, when rudely roused from his abode February fourth two thousand nine hundred and ninety nine just two days after said groundhog got prodded to predict, what surprises old man winter would deliver from his snowy white sleeve then juiced when he tried tug git cozy once again, an ear piercing cry rent quiet his pseudo Redmond Proficiency Academy den. Wails via this tearful papa surpassed decibel deemed tolerated, hence entire webbed threshold did reverb and rebound and he could not muffle ears to block out sound, nor would said creature trust his beady eyes, how metamorphosis doth confoundingly, blindingly, and astoundingly transformed alien (perfect E.T. Stand in) appearing gangly infant into a stunning - materiel sans as fashionably attired home coming queen crowned soon to be freshly minted high school senior, and perhaps college bound. Seventeen plus years ago (soon be nineteen years - she skipped to my lou eighteen), elapsed in a flash, as a newborn mandated to exit womb er full world uterine she did plash ordained by Mother Nature decreed must wriggle and leave placental stash without (of course) leaving a mass of trash. Thus, exit from birth canal complemented second and last daughter to the Harris mix whereby, she communicated via clucks just for kicks starting to gabble sounds vocalizing - sounds of cow bell licks influenced by Donald Duck and Leif Erics son, also enlisting literary feedback from Barack Obama, and his lovely brood of Dixie chic chicks attired in his wall den uniform bespeaking his pointed skill teaching pre-presidential days within ivied bricks primal utterances she acquired (courtesy of Alice Cooper) Retained like toys in attics. Like any buck minister fully taken aback this mister mom did fuss and fawn from one jimmy crack corn to the next rhyme, which captive infant audience gave no flack, precious heir from loins papa did help spawn - an everyday cracker Jack of all trades whereat n'er tiring as child rearing more challenging than untying Gordian knot without lack king and how, The Idler Wheel Is Wiser than the Driver of the Screw and Whipping Cords Will Serve You More than Ropes Will Ever Do to pack a Judy ish us punch, though thee Punim born with adroit skill to quack mimicking gripped banshees, denizens frenziedly shrieking out the box of Pandora - as if one felt a whack and a wallop, nonetheless infant younger daughter