Ode To Why You Should Keep Your Door Double Locked

One fine morning, in early July, A key opened a door that was locked-bye and bye No notice, no call, no fateful warning Uncle Frank walked in, unannounced, at eight in the morning Lo and behold, the occupant was awoken Some deep and recognized voice had spoken Heading toward the voice, with sleep in his eyes Robby said, "Uncle Frank! What a surprise!" "Well, I'm feeling fat and a little shaken. I'm afraid that yesterday I ate too much bacon. May I please use Grandma's old bathroom scale? Ever since her funeral, I feel like a whale. With a shake of his head and a polite, "No." Robby said, "You gonna wake up my ho. A princess of mine is sleeping fair So go ****ing weigh yourself in your own god damn lair."