Never Be Good Enough

I'm sick of all of the secrets & I'm tired of all of the lies I'm tired of all of them stupid boys - making me feel all this sickness inside I'm done with all of the negativity - I'm done with all of the fakes I'm over all of their fantasy-worlds - and I'm over all of the snakes I'm going to singlehandedly kill this one if he continues the abuse However; I can replace it - so I don't care at all that I'm being used I'm slowly preparing myself to finally get out & ghost From the person that was supposed to take care of me the most Today it's been seven whole nefarious frightening years But I'm just drowning deeper & deeper in these quicksand tears He's watching but he won't throw me a life boat He has on three layers of dry clothes on, but can plainly see that I'm soaked Layer upon layer all these years like an onion I peeled him back But every single time I'm out of line for a lady, or speak my mind - I get attacked Every time I disagree with him I get in trouble so much more But if he's here he'll kill me - if I begin to run for that door So I chill & strategize 'cause I've had to do this before Last time I was stuck in an alcoholic's domestic violence lore Why do I seem to magnetize to boys with broken & cut wings? These same stupid boys have offered even worse girls before me wedding rings It's gonna keep on happening to me 'til I f--king learn That my heart, love, respect, faithfulness, & loyalty most men don't deserve I'm way too good of a lady to watch them stomp in my name But silly boys will never stop abusing me, 'cause of their exes before me to blame I'm too damn golden to let another boy ever tarnish my vision So the best answer to this equation is simple division If I succeed to reclaim myself & my peace Maybe watching me happily will shift their belief Maybe when I finally walk away they'll all come to see Because they never chose to rise to my level - they'll never be good enough for me