My Parents Hated Me the Most Contest

It is our little monthly my-parents-hated-me-the-most-contest It starts after the third round of beers and is hilarious. There are six of us and at least three should know better. Winnie the whiner usually starts it for obvious reasons. “I almost died at two and Mom said she wished I had.” “My brother hit me in the face with a bat at four.” “RULES,” the rest of remind her. “My dad denied I was his.” Weird since she had his face. “My mom called me idiot,stupid, and dummy.” The rest of the nod, remembering her endearments for me. “My seven siblings do not speak to me or claim me.” “Doesn’t count,” “RULES!” We are ruthless about this. Interrupting each other now, we get louder and uglier. The best part of this contest happens as we head out. The other people dining almost always stand and cheer. At least they like us!