God Sent An E-F-5 My Way

On Sunday last my troubles blew away in an E-F-5. Good grief, Big Mean mama said, “Could you not keep my boy alive?” I had been praying for a wonderful catastrophe like this. For Frank G. Dell was a rounder, a real misfit. He was known to slap me and punch me and beat me around. I was optimistic when I heard the E-F-5 tornado sound. The highest of winds came up hard, and they came up fast. I did not know if either one of us would last. “Take them!” he yelled, pointing straight at the baby and me. Our darling child, aptly named Miss Dee. I knew he was awful. I knew he was bad. But he was my husband, and Miss Dee’s Dad. The wind promptly picked him up and gave him a spank. This was the end of my husband, my old man named Frank. I’ll raise his child, Big Mama said to me. A few minutes later, her corpse was hanging from a tree. God sent that E-F-5 to save me that day. When you mess with good people, you simply must pay.