Dirty Dick's Funeral
Some things said at funerals
are so surprising
’tis a wonder the deceased
doesn't start rising.
“He was the most honest of men,”
one speaker did assert.
But more than one listener
to Dirty Dick had lost a shirt.
“He always told the truth,"
his minister opted to claim.
But his long-time tax adviser
knew his lies were a shame.
“He didn’t speak ill of a soul,"
his doctor told the crowd.
But dozens he had smeared
disagreed openly and aloud.
Thus proceeded the funeral
of Dirty Dick McGraw.
All agreed it was a sham,
praise for a man they never saw.
There is a message in this tale
all would do well to observe.
Speak a eulogy honest and true—
one the departed would deserve.
Copyright © Paul Schneiter | Year Posted 2020
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