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Scarred For Life
It was late one night about half past ten When my wife made me meet the witch I was nervous and scared of the things to come When I broke out in a terrible itch We knocked on the door and I saw her shadow It was blocking out all of the light I was sweating and shaking from the the sound of her steps And it gave me such a horrible fright She opened the door and there she stood The smell was awful for something was stinkin' She had a tiny black beard that covered her face And looked a little like Abraham Lincoln Her voice sounded like a thrashing machine As she said, "So this is your brand new man?" My knees were wobbly and I couldn't even speak As she stretched forth her infected hand My throat was dry and I just couldn't breathe For the hair on her back was thick It tickled my nose when she turned around And I knew I was gonna be sick Well that's my story and I'm scarred for life It was the scariest thing that I've ever saw At least that's the way it was for me When I first met my mother-in-law
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Book: Reflection on the Important Things