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Enter Poem or Quote (Required)Required All those years flew away for nothing. Then of course the headaches started when weeping constantly at the unfairness of my marriage. You need to know that I didn't love him but I cherish the family we've created, you, my children are the center of my life. My hardships coping with my authoritarian husband drove us apart. I started drifting away to avoid being at his mercy . I couldn't help myself to get around those roadblocks that at the time deprived me from walking through a new path of change. I was stalling even in my silence, aware of all the deceptions that had come to characterize my life. I had learned the hard way to stay calm and pretend that I didn't sense what was happening to me, and let time do its magic. I wore this mask for so long I didn't feel safe without it exposing my true identity, it had to remain hidden . I stopped blaming myself as I was able to survive my pain over the years. Time has elapsed and done everything to diminish my anxiety and eventually allow my soul to heal. I cannot tolerate seeing myself weep anymore. I started genuinely enjoying every thought that passed by, ready to feed myself with knowing I would not repeat the same mistakes. I ended up riding this roller coaster of emotions feeling everything. I was able to survive the pain when I was at the bottomless despair. My walks alone under the blazing stars, imagining and wishing I would never see him again, craving my marriage to become a memory . I started feeling that I found my silence smoothed my inner anger, my passion has been real despite my original skepticism. Walking towards my cottage I knew there'd been a reason for it. Somehow though the wilderness enhanced the beauty around my cottage garden, the clouds were getting thicker and darker, running inside towards my refuge, I realized that I liked being in control of my own life. At Last. Therese Bacha 13 October 2014
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