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Enter Poem or Quote (Required)Required The prayer to god I did was: ,,Please make him forgive me god, please, make him think about the positive things, that they will a little brush off the negative thought or not be that important anymore. Just make him forget it. I don't want to make him feel bad or any kind of karma or anything else. I don't know why but I just want to that he thinks about what happend once again how I do everyday. I hope so much he understands. I will distance myself, I will try to choose my voice wisely. But god I don't k ow what to do. I just wish that, that he forgives me. That he doesn't feel bad about me. That he doesn't has bad rethinking of me. What does he think when people call up my name? When he sees me?" When I cried that day were he insulted my project I was confused why god would do this. You know that with school I always tried my best, Also with my project but still I am scared to be too much or unfair to others of how much effort I do. So how did he choice the final words which made me crawl in my bed: ,,Sometimes having less is better, you can improvise.", So it's way too long and I am annoying? I still didn't spoke words to you, Because always when you did I thought you would mock me or insult me or just annoy me while I don't even talk to you. While I don't even look at you anymore, while my mind plays crazy. I even unblocked you to try to make it for me normal. So why do you suddenly want to engange in funny things I do? Your smile and I guess good attempt didn't make me feel good at all. I thought it was as an ironically one meant, that you just want to mock me, to laugh about me. Why would he annoy me? I leave him alone why doesn't he? So I ran out of the classroom and couldn't stop crying. Suddenly I had hickups while crying, I stopped sometime but then it started all over again. I was confused and didn't understand why god would make me overcome this, to experience this. To let me know I am not healing yet? But when he called up my name, I saw his chaotisch face and noticed that he didn't follow me even though I ran away from him. He stood beside the people who asked me if I was doing alright. The next day he pointed out that my bag still is under the table, that I forgot it. I smiled with such a bright smile that my eyes were instantly closed. And my high pitched voice saying: ,,thank you" Why how? While days where coming by, I highly noticed the attemps he did, he waited till I went to bathroom first. Till i went through the door first.
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