I am only curious

I sit beside myself and think, And try to evaluate my life; Yes, my life that is blotted with ink My life of which evaluation would cause strife. A strife between the living and the dead, Between our world and theirs too; Between the ignoramus and the intellectually well-bred. A conflict none can describe as new! I sin and sin again and then realize; And beyond any doubt, more than twice repent, Only to go back and iterate the vice, And thus to my record add a fresh dent. Lord, I have but a very curious mind, Some would refer to me as a wandering soul In the land of wisdom, knowledge and the kind, But their mysteries and their sins, I am attracted to them all! Now spare any mercy that you might find And forgive the sins of my kindly person, I have not committed the ones that cross the line; A few lies here and there, but not the dreaded arson. Now, I sit beside myself and think And ponder over a future without blemish; A time when no deed will morally stink, Where all transgressions will have vanished.