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Forum Home » High Critique » Looking for a Critical Eye - Rain

For poets who want unrestricted constructive criticism. This is NOT a vanity workshop. If you do not want your poem seriously critiqued, do not post here. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!
6/11/2012 12:38:23 PM

Ann Roske
Posts: 2
I am not comfortable with free verse - how can I improve?

Rain drops falling on the windowpane
Drenching, quenching earth'sthirst.
Caught by streams, flowing intorivers, rushing to the sea.
The river mouth kisses the saltydelta
Running to open water and carriedout to sea.

Pulled up by the heat of tropicalair,
A briny condensation forms.
Pushed by a powerful westerlyflow, colliding with the Costal range.
Clouds drop their gifts back ontothe glass
Rain water drops gently from thesky.
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