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Forum Home » Be Gentle » I'd like some feedback please. Thanks

Post here if you're new to receiving a critique and you want "gentle" feedback on your poem. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!

6/24/2017 6:15:35 PM Teresa Gonzales Posts: 1	UNBROKEN BONDS by Teresa Gonzales Blessed babe, so pale and still, It breaks my heart you couldn't stay. The same heart that you slept beneath, Becoming part of as you lay. Warm and safe, by love surrounded, My womb the only world you knew. Untouched by harsh reality, In innocence there you dreamt and grew. And what of lessons learned from you? In the short time that we had, it seems, Of joy and sadness, love and loss, You taught me of a mother's dreams. Beloved child, we are not parted. Our bonds, forged in the blood we share, Whatever comes, will hold unbroken. No force exists they cannot bear. If in my arms I cannot hold you, Within my heart held you will be. Treasured there til my last breath, My life's most precious memory. It matters not, the depth of darkness. It's banished by the smallest light. When I look into the night's clear heavens, I find your star there, shining bright.
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7/13/2017 6:05:30 PM Jerome Malenfant Posts: 26	Great! Usually I don't care for sentimental poems. It's not that I'm against sentiment, just that most poets here can't pull it off without being mawkish. But this is outstanding!
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7/15/2017 9:01:35 AM Jay Vee Posts: 8	Absloutly wonderful! I can feel every word. I believe the greatest thing a poet can do is move someone with their words. You my friend, have moved me profoundly.
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