Book: Reflection on the Important Things

Get Your Premium Membership

Poetry Forum

home recent topics recent posts search faq

Forum Home » High Critique » Perfections1

For poets who want unrestricted constructive criticism. This is NOT a vanity workshop. If you do not want your poem seriously critiqued, do not post here. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!

what do you guys think?

7/18/2013 11:31:14 AM

Ako Henshaw
Posts: 2
In the very first start it sounded sweet.
Cool! cool! it didn't went every day,
events unfolded as we bridged time across.
I saw it came to a perfection but was it......
Now the tides have changed,
The pretty, beautiful, and came a price
One which an angel couldn't have.
Hairs stood at ends waking every day....
See the same face at dull lights.
Kiss lips of a kind through time bedeviled me....
Waters parade the bridges at my detriments
so it's i call marriage in time
at the very fist start 'twas sweet
but a contempt view
go for perfection and pray for redemption.....
permalink • reply with quote

Forum Home » High Critique » Perfections1




Powered by AspNetForum 6.6.0.0 © 2006-2010 Jitbit Software