Short Accountant Poems

hopeful and happy
the little girl counts to ten
does it nine more times...

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 Obituary - Accountant David Jones ( who died penniless)

His whole life counted for nothing...

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Well, I'll be a son of a gun!
Our Filing Clerk is having fun!
She stopped her chores
And dropped her drawers
Who knew the Accountant could run?...

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She works in accounting at the factory,
loves counting numbers and her salary,
she has it made,
till she got weighed,
obviously hates counting calories.







11-20-16...

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There once was an accountant named Laverne
Her clients' loyalty she'd always earn --
   She never talked tax
   She gave them Ex-lax --
Made it so 'easy' to file their return  


             Female...

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If you try to count 
the damage of hate 
on this planet earth, 
you can  become 
dead before you reach
the finishment
of the project.
It is a difficult assignment
which can confuse
any top world accountant. 

October 04/2023...

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Adam was an 
acceptable accountant
And Eve a bubblingly 
bright bookkeeper;
Adam loved the 
First-In, First-Out
Accounting (FIFO) system, 
While Eve preferred 
The Last-In, First-Out
Inventory (LIFO) system;  
Together they testified that
Inventoried sweet fruit 
should neither 
Sits and spoil 
nor go to the 
Garden wastebasket 
Wrongfully....

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Epigram 1

If you see a man in the park
Looking up to the sky, ignore him.
He is most likely a poet 
Lost in the labyrinth of words. 


Epigram2
Do not assume the man in the park
Dressed in a woolly overcoat and
Laughing like he is looking into 
A kaleidoscope is necessarily a poet. 


Epigram 3
If you see a man in a café writing 
Something in his note pad, he is
 Most likely an accountant late for 
Work, evaluating his excuses....

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Paul was at the office when the
first atomic bomb fell and when 
Muntz TVs replaced console radios

and the first man landed on the moon.
He saw the first big computers trucked in 
and locked in a top-secret room.

Paul was an accountant for 50 years
but the day came when he was told 
he was part of a reduction in force. 

Two guards carried his boxes out.
They told Paul in the parking lot  
he was the only one reduced.


Donal Mahoney...

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Through the Venetian's I spy the world
The well dressed lady on the way to work
An accountant or banker I guess
The man in the green parka and jeans
I reckon he's a barber or painter of sorts
A car goes past with dubious occupants
They're here to case out the houses no doubt
Burglars or robbers or just wrong doers
The world is there to be judged by me
Decisions made with no substance to back
Imagination in overdrive
It's great thinking like this
Prejudice is fun...

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"I go to Burning Man every year," Timidia told us.
My husband and I nearly spit out our coffee.
She was an accountant, unassuming, dumpy.
She wore shirts with plastic pen protectors.

Timidia attended Burning Man!
What?
In those clothes? I asked her.
She shook her head, no.  "In no clothes at all"

I now picture her in a whole new way.
Wishing that she weighed a teensy bit less.
I go too, her Bohemian husband said.
He has hair down to his hoo-hah. No surprise here....

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"I go to Burning Man every year," Timidia told us.
My husband and I nearly spit out our coffee.
She was an accountant, unassuming, dumpy.
She wore shirts with plastic pen protectors.

Timidia attended Burning Man!
What?
In those clothes? I asked her.
She shook her head, no.  "In no clothes at all"

I now picture her in a whole new way.
Wishing that she weighed a teensy bit less.
I go too, her Bohemian husband said.
He has hair down to his hoo-hah. No surprise here....

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Okay all you supposedly normal people.
I  have something to say.
GET LOST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don't ever want to see you again.
With all your ducks in a row.
You are no fun and never will be.
Give me your eccentrics.
YOur idiots and fools.
 I want the jester but leave the accountant behind.
Give me purples, greens, and blues.
All of the hues.
These people are interesting.
 I want the people who think for themselves.
Who are willing to be one.
I tell you normal is overrated....

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An accountant asks for accuracy
Playing figures 
Always got his mind tangled
Blurring his eyes
And so bustling the calculator
Making his neck strained and fingers stiff
But the cunning figures 
Still manage to escape 
From his balance sheet sometimes
Causing him a severe headache
What's more
So surprisingly 
Sometimes has to go all the ways 
To make fool of the figures
For tax evasion
Making himself
Restless and guilty
For the rest of the day
For the rest of his career life...

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