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like u care

I wish people wouldn’t take me for granted…
I wish people would understand I get angry
I wish people wouldn’t mention things that hurt others…
I wish people would not gossip and let me be

I wish people wouldn’t hurt my feelings
I have been dealing with this heartache for years on end and I’ve been shattered by fears
I wish people would respect me and not bring up my past doings
I have been stealing this feeling of comfort from these shedding of endless, grieving tears

I wish you’d understand where I stand in this 
I wish you wouldn’t give me so much distress
You don’t care much about my hopelessness
Fine, be a bitter wood and I’ll make progress

I wish people wouldn’t blackmail me for the way I feel…
I pray you’d save me from myself, feeling insecure
I prayed a million, billion, trillion times like no big deal…
I may say this before I go — find me an infinite cure

I wish people could have a heart or two
Maybe, if I wasn’t so stubborn, I’d grow up too
I wish people could think before they say
Because it hurts, living this way in disarray

In dismay, I cry out to You
I pray in this wrecked, poetic rue
I wish you’d keep your opinions to yourself too
Shoo away the desires of hurting myself, true

I hate the way I’ve become…
This man of a single bread crumb
You devoured me in the fire of your lying
You tortured me with your…constant denying

I deny the lies you spread about me
I deny the lies you have in your head
I deny the lies you speak of so highly
I deny the lies that don’t set free the truth in utter dread

Instead, give me beautiful, sugarcoated lies in disgrace 
Instead, I wish people wouldn’t be so ignorant
Instead, I pray in my mindset and in my mind space 
Instead, let me live life without mentioning the past and make the future that more significant

I wish people would see that I’m significant and strong
I wish people could believe in the truth behind the lies 
I wish people would simply belong and tell me that I’m not wrong
To feel the way I feel…despite your heartless goodbyes

Farewell,
Where will you dwell?
Away from me? No one could tell
I’m under a wicked spell
I’m living a heaven and a hell
Look at my eyes — these tears swell
Inside my inner being and I’m crawling into my shell
All of me is going pell-mell
What’s that awful, rancid smell?

That’s the heartache I have to deal with…I will surely endure
That’s the loneliness I had to bear
Cuz I have so much more heartfelt pages of rage to tear
Angry that you hurt others for your own gain and pleasure
Go ahead, let your emotions flare
Cuz I have so much more bittersweet, forlorn poetry to share

Like you…
Truly care…
It’s true —
Life’s not fair

— like u care

Copyright © J.W. Earnings

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Book: Reflection on the Important Things