Still jump when phones ring

Written by: Tanis Troutman

Lost in Loss

The phone rang,
Then the shaking voice,
They say what has occurred,
Then everything's hazy and blurred
Then there's strangers 
Talking to me,
I can't hear
Things are spinning in slow motion
I'm not sure I'm really here
I have to keep pacing
To stop would mean facing
Faces concerned, voices muffled 
I must keep pacing
This isn't real
The crises team watches
They whisper
Come to me slowly, as if approaching a bomb
They speak, I don't hear there words
I speak, but it's not me
My words are loud
In the car now
Little pills
Hospital bed
Phone call
My husband is dead