Relationship Parody Poems

Pardon me, sir
    No, you go first
  You have right of way
    I defer to you. Go ahead

...

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A monkey once sat
On a gentleman’s lap
And its antics were truly uproarious
The chain at its wrist
Jangled back to the fist
Of the fabulous Lady Notorious

“Excuse me,...

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Two scales must always be in balance
for accurate evidence and the relationship
between God and Mankind must stand;
there has to be an undeniable force
to cause such...

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Well! Damned Nation…
Oh. Hey! You there!
You are in a rush, 
I see.
Can you point me to the holly-caust?
Where the burn of sulfur flares? 
Ah yessss,...

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The Bachelor Spectacular
by Michael R. Burch

One heart? Tossed aside.
The other? A bride’s.
In all his great wisdom, the bachelor decides.

Eeenie, mean-ie, mine-y, mo’,
one gal must stay...

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Showing interest 
   She panders to his prowess 
      Oh my! you spread well...

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my parody

My husband's like to water, I to oil.
We're masters of the knock-down, drag-out brawl.
We just don't mix. I cause his blood to boil
and he...

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I love Kim and Kim loves me
We’re as friendly as can be,
Were it not for this one thing
I’d endorse the kid as King.
But maturity eludes...

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Incoming ... 
distress missive call
Hangups on the other side
of the continental divide cellular room 
Mushroom sobs of insecurity  
click end of volatile transmission 
Redialitis...

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I WISH I'D LEARNED TO SEW

I wish I’d learned to sew
My mother asks me how
How I’ve survived till now…
I tell her I don’t know

I’m feeling...

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She sits in her Ivory Tower
Her face like a lemon, so sour
She mocks the human race
With a scowl on her face
She’s not seen for many...

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in the dream I had 
many appeared
extras plenty
but loved ones too

all had seen
that same dream
but only one got it
others had no clue...

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I'm tired of them
always feeding on me
Parasites they be ... sucking the life out of me, slowly
How did they worm their way into my life,
attaching...

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I had my heart put on auto-pilot,
set to navigate towards you; 

the low-battery signal just came on,
I don't know what to do....

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MORE THAN A SIGNIFICANT OTHER - IAMBIC METER!

“Come live / with me / and be / my love.”

I ask of you this because you are...

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