Funny Number Poems

Currently I find myself confined

To 1 room my bedroom

In the 3 bedroom house I presently
own or should I rather say have to
repay the mortgage on

Because...

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Shout out to my depression
My best friend 
It takes courage to live
But we take living for granted 
Until a pandemic comes along and puts everyone...

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Tonight's our night
We've been waiting weeks
Our favourite Bistro
For Potato soup with leeks

They gave us 'our' table
The one by the door
Where we first sat
Table number 4

I...

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Should I become a middle school math or English teacher?
Leave my bed early in the morning and return with test papers to grade.
With what authority...

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Looking back, one thing comes clean-glass clear
you were always there for me subduing every fear.

I tried to do my duty, be a husband strong and...

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Yes, I looked deep into the palm of my hand nope no muse for any of us there. 

Then I took off lollygagging on a...

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File Number

364 was especially hard to deal with today. 
The worker made a check in the empty box. 
She used red ink. 

Wife beater, 
drinker,...

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Tim is tall. Handsome.
Works in an office.
Like all of the others
he looks kind of polished.
They say small talk is dead.
So I ask for a date.
The...

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Thought it would be fun to write a cute little Smarty Pants poem.
I was crazy with excitement about it, laughing with happiness gore.
I was so...

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For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain
Definitely a sales pitch, the stain is very large
Remember half the people you know are below...

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On Tuesday night, Nick died quietly at home in his bed
He left a grieving wife and their two adult children
After a long and indescribable journey...

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I think it’s funny when in the thrift store I see
An Alcoholics Anonymous handbook donated to charity
With the former owner’s full name on the front,...

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So I go to the license bureau
to get my plates renewed
(I wish I’d swallowed cyanide instead!)

The man says ‘take a number’
I get ONE NINETY TWO
though...

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“EARS OF FURY #2”


this Monday will be a year 
that I’ve known her. 
ironically, it is the exact 
time it all fell apart. I met...

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.
&
if her
shampoo 
and conditioner
are not the same brand
...............................
then she's a
guy
....

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