Long Backside Poems

They were gambling in front of the house.
Manservants and pages bustled about
Serving Suitors who just curse and carouse.
Few mix wine with water. I heard one shout,
"Clean down the tables with wet sponges! Rouse
Yourselves! And when...

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Date:   January 4  2046

Damali and DJ were active in the 
Small house sprucing up for their
Day. "Hey happy birthday partner!"
Damali jostled DJ. In the main house 
Now 11 morning time. Damian had
Plans...

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Many of us have a favorite possession from when we were young, and this 
93-year old gentleman is no exception.

               ...

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I have a little story to tell you ... it's absolutely true, of course, at least as far as I'm concerned, but you can take it as you wish - as a tale, a fact,...

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‘She’s on again - the annual campin’ trip regatta,
and we’ve got ourselves together for our plans to Wonnangatta. 
The high country; you can’t beat it for the peace and quiet
unless of course some plans get...

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C. T. Myers


Just a couple weeks ago the boss called in an ad, hoping we could find a guy to fill Bill Daly’s shoes.
Bill had fallen victim to the same thing that his dad had,...

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Slang..
Chick-fil-a = the best place ever
jade = 
brooke = gorgeous 
mishin = the boss, as in “You aren’t the boss of me.”

Orpheus
We’re on vaycay. School is OVER, COVID is over. We’re in New York City...

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Preparations for 'Luau' (LOU-ow) or a Hawaiian Party-like event, for a church Luau, would be a 'Ho'ike' (hoe-'E-kay). The hunters will tie the hind legs of whatever animal will go into an 'i'mu' (E'-moo), which...

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I’m lunching with my bestie Mylie
She’s upset and no longer smiley
I ask her what’s wrong
She said in my thong
My bottom is no match for Kylie!

I giggled and said stop your moans
You're perfect not like Bridget...

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“We need to talk!    Something I perceive as being nothing short of scary’s now been going on for several years…it’s got to stop!
Insurance costs are soaring…and the cost of some prescriptions is...

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Ace colonoscopy doctor Kellen Karl Kovalovich

revisited January 23rd, 2024
on the evening before yours truly
(the one and only Matthew Scott Harris),
a stand up comic wannabe, who
historically heartily hales 
from Schwenksville, Pennsylvania
undergoes oh joy rapture colonoscopy.

Three days...

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Hey bruh, 
haven’t you heard,
ain’t you read the news?
The White House is gonna eradicate 
the fear infested inner city blues
That Trump fella says,
he’s got his poison pen ready to use
He says black folks got nothing...

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In April of this year I began preparing a new organic gardening patch,
planning to have it ready for next year's expansion from a too-small garden
in front of my recently acquired Connecticut Cape Cod home.

I have...

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Everyone was gone, and the pool beckoned -
          one-piece bathing suit, on your perfect petite form ...
         ...

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                      I
 Remember when days were long
   and all de children do...

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We all have favorite times of year, and I am no exception.
If I were forced to pick a favorite time, it would be fall.
Though not because it sports the finest garb, although it does,
But rather...

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“Might you have an opening for an auction fairly soon?   If I move, I'm gonna have a ton of stuff to sell.”
“I'm trying to find a building at the moment,” he replied, “a...

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Date:   March  2024

Dominant dapper Damian was on his way home.
6'5" nearly 300 pounds of domination.
That... was the situation. How would she
Conquer him?  Her thoughts were dangerous.

 Dolly was 5'7" 180 pounds...

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Most of you, I don’t suppose, devote a lot of time to wond’ring ‘bout your death, but, now and then, 
I begin imagining some pretty strange scenarios.   Of course I’m going to die,...

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10:30 at night everything was 
peaceful in the Damian Hakim 
household. Children were
Safely in there dreams. But the
Seven were wide eyed and 
Would soon begin to let the
Parents know they were needed.
The racket began. Damian...

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Ace colonoscopy doctors Kellen Karl Kovalovich
and Larry Borowsky

Though necessary to down: 
four Dulcolax laxative tablets, 
quaff half 238 gram bottle of Miralax 
over span of eight hours, 
and if necessary even one Fleets Enema, 
I...

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Listen my son
and you shall hear
strange curiosities
about my spiritual career.

A student of science
Left hemispheric

A student of religion
Right ancient indigenous feelings
kinda queeric

With mindbody Left lightpowered thoughts,
ecopolitically sold out wealthy mind
bought health embodied
for re-connecting Left dogmatic 
voiced...

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Kirby Kirby’s sister’s brother’s cat bit Bill Belushi’s 45 lb. Yorkie on the *** last Tuesday night,
And I’m a real big fan of dogs so…when it comes to felines…bitin’ canines ANYWHERE, well...I don’t think it’s...

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Timothy had always been a man of laughing joy and conversation	


               -Friendship dialogue communication -


But now there was silence but for...

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THE VALENTINE PHOTO--2014
  Bubba was tired and his feet were aching from walking so
much. He and Carly had walked up and down the block 5 times
looking for his wallet. It only had $46 in...

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