Confusion Limerick Poems

Les Moore went to the liquor store

But wound up passed out on the floor

Woke disappointed

And quite disjointed

I guess you might say less is more...

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The government antitrust case
Could iPhone apps bust and erase
While cores from this trial
Face seeds of denial
Picking apples will stay in place...

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The people all gathered they had such hope,
To see magic tricks, I’d shown to the pope.
I jumped and flipped and spun around,
They booed when I...

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 There was a fly who fell for a spider
He made her tummy churn inside her
She entered his web
Thought she’d be wed
But became just a...

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To kiss my babe I looked quite ahead,
But circled the wrong day with bright red--
	Valentine's, I had reckoned,
	Fell in Feb on the second
So I kissed...

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When my donkey does loudly bray.
Then I know he is out of hay.
I’ll bring a new bale,
And away he’ll sail.
I hope he’s not running away.
...

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Immigrantis will poison our blood
Flotillis nonabzorba—a flood
Trumpcissus doth speak
And shall bear this critique
“Thou orate constantinely such crud!”...

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the director had said, “our needs are dire”
my wife volunteered us both for the choir
always something going wrong
with my voice I won’t last long 
it...

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You’re trying to hang tough
But your ball's in the rough
Don’t throw a fit
Just think then hit
Forget all that pro stuff
...

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I am feeling a bit of remorse
I guess I should have checked my source
The name Billie was on the note
I just assumed it was a...

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There was an old woman from Dorset
Who forgot to fasten her corset
When she was in town
Her knickers also came down
 To save her face 
She...

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Where’er you may be let be, said Loulie
Who cannot control her flatulency
Wherever she roams 
She plays her air drone
Allowing foul odours to flow freely.

Loulie’s mother...

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Near the park, I screamed at a big chap—
“Do not pee by the roadside, ape-man!”
oh, because I seen fright,
I peed on a shrub a night.
The...

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Embrace them or fight, with smiles or a scowl
Inevitable, so don't throw the towel
Divine winds of change
Inherently strange
Come not whispering, but surge with a howl...

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What They're Furries!!!!!!!

Kids identify that they are pets
Do they sleep in fur lined bassinets
And if they get a chill
Or are feeling quite ill
Do doctors treat...

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