Husband Funny Love Poems

onyun soups the bind that ties

spousey wins pulitzer prize

recipe steeped

in onyuns weeped

so tasty it closed my eyes.
...

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Can you take this flower?
Why?
You meant why?
Yes ! Why? 
Take it please?
So Why? 
You meant again Why? 
Forcing me , Why? 
It is yours
Liar! 
Why...

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I have a woman.
I’m proud to call her my wife.
Some give theirs’ nicknames, ‘her indoors’ and ‘the trouble and strife’
Now, I have my flaws and...

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Inapropos trois faux pas jokingly blurted out...

yesterday August 30th, 2022.

The following fictitious account
predicated upon words spilling
out me mouth before taking time
to think through how sarcastic...

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The Swing

Writing from the porch now. 
I am down to paper and pen. 
Rocky will not let me 
have anything else. 
He insists on all...

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Happy

You make me laugh, 
all the time. 
You make me smile 
when I don't want to.
You make me say things, 
that I never thought I...

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A wealthy old man in his fifties,
Loved a girl he thought was just nifty.
Said, Will you marry me,
I'm just fifty-three?
But she married a man in...

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Living on a little farm
In the Western NC Mountains
Means experiencing the cock-a-doodle-doo
The Moo-Moo-Moo, the meow and woof
And finally, the gobble-gobble

Each one of our barnyard residents
Find...

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Looking back, one thing comes clean-glass clear
you were always there for me subduing every fear.

I tried to do my duty, be a husband strong and...

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On my every pair
  of underwear
I have drawn
  a flower

Pink tulip here
  red rose there
I take them off
  to shower

My wife,...

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Troubled as to what I'll choose
something which will bemuse
the man who has it all
This is not an easy task 
it's an even more strenuous ask
that...

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It’s when you don't have
the money for a hit man.
And you know something
needs to be done.
If you have a hot date
and your boss asked you
to...

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What is that strange sound? I demand.
My husband hears nothing.
You do not hear that?
He shakes his head ‘no’.
“That sound of water running?”
He listens. “You mean...

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She only came to me when she wanted wine
Meeting at a bar could do that, tainting each meeting
I always had a bottle of her favorite...

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She was lean, she was mean, a fighting machine.
Sixteen brothers had toughened her up.
She was secret woman, our little Arlene.
Raised on cold kerosene from a...

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