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Acrostic
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KURT COBAIN
K Kurt Cobain my idol you still--always remain
U Unique in a way that few can seek to explain
R Rejecting yourself – inflicted by a life of pain
T Too many fans- too overwhelming your fame
C Courageously you continued to light a flame
O Our hearts you won-- the talent and shame
B ‘Breed’ and ‘Stay away’—always ‘On a Plain’
A ‘All Apologies’ as your hurt remained the same
I Imagine lost music if your life we might reclaim
N ‘Nevermind?’ suicide…tragic choice… end game
(A dedication to an icon lost…figuratively and literally)
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Free verse
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Believe,
After every single unfathomable action-
Every tear-
Every lie-
Every attempted gas light-
Every knife in my back.
In love,
When my heart is just dust blown away in the breeze-
When I can't even look at you without the urge for murder or suicide-
When I’m not sure I even think love exists anymore-
When I can’t really even tell what I look like now-
When your words are absolutely worthless.
Impossible.
Because your money is dirt and your time is gold-
And I’m filthy poor-
And I have no more sleepless nights to lose to you-
And I don’t think anyone deserves to be trusted you least of all-
And I can not comprehend ever giving anyone that power over me again.
4/12/2023
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Haibun
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DAMMED EITHER WAY
It is fair to say; those of low self-esteem or lacking in self-worth are attracted to narcissists, who then take great pleasure in trying to destroy their so-called victim, whether morally or even mentally by actual death, as a narcissist can often send its so-called victim on to commit suicide.
The so-called victim wants what the narcissist had got, power and self-esteem and vice a versa, the narcissist wants the so-called victim’s vulnerability and innocence, in which to go on to portray to the world, “Hey; look at me; I am a nice person”, not so . . .
Now; here is the problem, to which party do you put the blame on, when both parties are attracted to each other by the law of attraction . . .
And: the so-called victim of narcissists tend to go onto being a narcissist themselves
I'm not your victim
Any more than you to me
We each just take turns
The only true goodness in this story is once the so-called victim has suffered at the hands of a narcissist and escapes from their grip, they will soon come to learn the signs of another narcissist, and, learn to avoid them like hell . . . : )
Indiana Shaw . . . -_-
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Couplet
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HER SEDUCTIVE VOICE
Her seductiveness rang out; in the still of night
Every man listening out for her, shines his light
She was a story teller on a pirate radio, no ads
Moved from place to place coming with no bags
With every new town; she broke a man’s heart
Her stories of seduction gave every man a part
Was not talking to all only you inside your head
You took her into your heart and into your bed
Smart enough, not to mention anyone by name
Every man out there, playing a part in her game
Gave out secret messages to those in the know
With them running; to make love on her plateau
She never as went without, each giving her gold
Then rushing home to the radio, their story told
Each was unsuspecting; of each other’s exploits
Playing her way from New York, as off to Detroit
She has done Minneapolis and back to the coast
When done radio switched off, she; but a ghost
She collected diamonds rings, pawned many too
Because; no one ever saw her again, none knew
Some left traumatised ending committing suicide
Other's married quickly wanted her to their bride
The woman on the radio, who left no good-byes
Who stopped at nothing as left you with her lies
Indiana Shaw . . . : /
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Free verse
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Daylight savings is the aftermath of an insomnia-stricken soul
And when the rain falls, I wonder, does he still see the stars glow?
I am an artist, specializing in destruction of the nerves by fire
Maybe that's why I am so afraid of drowning
And then he says, until our first kiss
He didn't realize what that kind of love was
I say we just fit together correctly
He knows that's my way of saying I love him too
All of my friends are zombies, and they just pretend to be me
Walking like they are empty
But the truth is, being hollow is not pretty
And I read a quote today that said "Suicide is not poetic."
And I'd have to say that I agree
But neither is imitation or being poor
Unwashed hair and holes in you clothing does not make you look like a Master of Creation
It makes you look like a fool for declining all of that which others seek to have
Humans are not transparent
We just pretend we are
Because being a ghost is so much easier than dealing with the sad, sad story that we call life
Addiction does not make you look fearless
I was sent to my knees every time I had a bottle in my hands
And he says he wishes he could be as poetic as me at times
And I told him "Some days, I think it will be the death of me."
So, darling, please, come here and let me hold you
For my time is short
I know my life will be over in fifty years at least
But for once I pray to something that I live long enough to see you smile a million times
I promise I will count
I know, we see that often, love is shameful
But this is what sets us apart
My only shame is to say that I have wronged you
Now, today I deliver my apologies
And I offer you my heart
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