Christmas Burlesque Poems

Imagine those who are heading into Christmas,
Without a moral compass,
Now imagine that on mass,
For people who don't mow their grass,
Not just on one landmass,
Add in...

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Hitler, the artist

It is Christmas Eve, and the TV has nothing to offer
but sentimental tunes and the endless stories of how
a rich man became nice...

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Skipping Christmas,
Always seems like a good idea at the time,
When you are standing in line,
To buy some twine,
And you have yet to dine, 
While expecting...

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We may not look forward to being old,
But there are perks for those of us who get to be old,
Which is a perk in itself....

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Save the Parent before you cannot save the Child....

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Every now and then,
When the moon is in the right quarter,
I think of my daughter,
And then, 
I want to bake a cheesecake that is even...

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A tirade

It is nearing my birthday, and I hate the thought
my wife asks me what I want, and suggests an electric bike
with three wheels: she...

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As we get older,
Our ability to demolish what is on our plate in short order,
Becomes a pleasure no longer,
And without teenagers around to even the...

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I will never be in the running for Father of the year,
But I do not care,
Enough to shed even one tear,
This or any other year,
As...

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After many hiccups along the way,
My faith in flying cars has been rewarded,
The promises given in the sixties, 
That got buried alive in the seventies,
That...

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Pre-Surgery

A green long-leaved plant on the table
she says doesn’t need water for the next fortnight.
Does the plant bear flower? 
No, she says it is supposed...

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My baby has bi-lateral bonbons.
She modulates her rhythm side to side.
She’s a twenty-mule team moving violation,
Her motives pure as borax, her methods bona fide. ...

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Well now, isn’t that just dandy?!
Isn’t this some fun?!
Another Christmas cancelled. 
Another party undone.

I’m double vaxed and boosted.
Short on TP, but not of stress.
I stay...

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'Twas the night before tomorrow
And the morning after that.
Father Time passed by discretely, 
Didn’t even tip his hat.
The calendars of bygone years
Stacked up to nothing...

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I’m passing by a festive window. 
Had to stop and scratch my chin. 
Feelin’ lost and disenfranchised. 
Wish I knew some next of kin. 
I’m...

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