Letter From a Classic Archetypal Dope, January 4, 1960 - Part Three

Part Three Did you not notice then How uneasy I was in the eye of abundance How hiding from the surfeit of joy From whose very object I Learned not to cry And so all through with fear Fear opening fresh fear Without respite, without cause Deft day handling stolen night Within the walls of our breath Smarting, whining Nudging through illusory pretences Waking and making our presence Forever shy of ourselves As if all this were not true Heart closing on heart Excreting gratitude You have done your part What more could I ask Could you then blame me that I fought Every step of your way to me For what I was worth to you I was ready as a knave to soot And when indeed you took a man You took to bed a goon not a man Though we account for ourselves and whatever we have accounted for We do not take ourselves apart and when we have to account for ourselves between you and me Then what we have to account for is three You, the goon, and the man or me But when we have nothing to account for There is but one lonesome count And so you came to me A thwarted child and you told me "You .... Me" © T. Wignesan - Paris, 1957 (from Tracks of a Tramp. Kuala Lumpur-Singapore: Rayirath Publications, 1961.) Rev. 2012.