16 Years of War

~My True Story 16 Years Of War~ !6 years of living in fear every minute, 16 years living with barely any electricity,water, food,hurt from humiliation standing in line for hours to maybe obtain a loaf of bread for my children, some days due to lack of water, we would shower from the pouring rain on the roof,and for us that was a good day. The fear of being stopped at a barrier from the militia, and if they decide to kill at the time, we would have been a good target, agonizing each day not knowing when a lost bomb would penetrate our roof tops,or bedrooms,running down for shelter at our neighbors first floor home,sometimes days in the same clothes no food,not even a drop of water,as we could not move from the hilarious shelling,bullets aimed at us the innocent who had nothing to do with politics and war. We lived without once hearing a siren so we can run to the shelter,nothing indicated where the shells will land,we had sometimes to cross the street to hide in our church,or other gatherings to escape the guerillas. The only way to know if I can go to work and kids to university,was listen to the radio just to guess which way was safer to drive,many times over the years, bombs landed not far from my car,had to leave and run underneath it as a protection,my eldest son was once kidnapped for 3 days, once the banging on our door so loud, they came to take my children to fight with them, because they lacked men on the field. Days I would arrive late to work due to the bombs. My fear progressed as I was doomed and sensed disaster. In summer we had no air condition due to no electricity, in winter we had no heating,days we slept with our winter coats if we were not already in the shelter,16 years of war we slept awake. My strength out of love to both my children,they graduated my eldest became an architect,and the youngest became a lawyer. Had to send them away at a very early age,left alone with my husband at the time. My duty was fulfilled when they both left. A happening that happened during that war,was my secret for years and years,I hid it,I kept it alive inside of me,not to allow anyone discover how I died and lived only because of my love towards my children,I was hiding for years,now only something stirred deep in me,a voice,begging me to come at peace within myself,is the only way to write it down,as enough is enough,no details,I will write,none to ask what, why,when,who,only the rape happened,my spirit and soul agonized,now I am a free woman.No more tears, no more fears. Today in a new country of freedom accepted me 25 years ago as a political refugee, I am very happy, my children are safe, As we did survive 16 years of a major war in our country. Freedom is so beautiful,feeling safe having showers,eating, variety of food,getting a heater to remain warm,air condition during summer,driving with no fear,walking with a sense of freedom,it took us a while to return to normal, the truth became beautiful due to the transformation of our inner spirits,living in the depth of darkness for years took sometime to regroup our inner souls to run far from darkness and live into the light again. Free At Last. Therese Bacha 7 September 2014 Contest for